The afternoon delight and Devil Wears Prada  

Wednesday, 3 September 2008

Hi bloggers after calming myself down with the assistance of City girl I have now returned to give you some more insight into this crazy life of mine down under. Unlike City girl my job is relatively boring. I work as a legal research assistant for a boutique law firm based in Melbourne's central business district. It already sounds boring right? Well it would be if you did not know what went on in the hallowed halls of D & D associates. My immediate boss Ms. DWP (Devil Wears Prada) wears the latest and only the most expensive outfits to work, her Christian Louboutin sky scraper stilettos are surely a health and safety code violation nine times over, her Chanel perfume is so strong you know whether she has just entered, is about to enter or has just left a room by the sstrength of the scent. She has her hair appointments every Friday at 3pm and her full spa session at 4pm on a Monday. I pity her secretaries and I am eternally grateful I only need to see her 3 times in a week or when I am required. My job is to research legislation, facts about clients and the other side that is relevant to the case. I am like a detective but better paid and if I might say better dressed. Now today was a funny day as it turns out Ms. DWP has just fired her 2nd Secretary (she has three in total, do not ask me why) Anyway Secretary 2 was fired today, her offence you may ask? Well to the outsider it was a simple case. It would seem that Secretary 2 was caught blogging about her boss and some clients! LOL If I had known about this blog I would have been a contributor (don't worry bloggers, I am hoping that the Blog has not been deleted because we can all delight in reading the blog post link from here.) Unlike Secretary 2 I do not stupidly blog at work. Our computers are regularly checked for "illegal downloads, unsavoury folders or files or any like documents potentially harmful to the privacy of the firm and its clients" or so says the contract we all signed when we started.
As Ms.DWP is currently sleeping with the head IT manager who also happens to be....wait for it....drum roll..... Secretary 2's fiancee it was only a matter of time before she was going to be caught out. I hear Secretary 2 is planning on suing the firm for invasion of privacy but believe me she might as well give up now. Her boss has her job, her man and will have her dignity if she goes down that path, tha woman is quite ruthless. Now you may wonder how I know about Ms.DWP and her boy toy aka afternoon delight. I do not know what is with people these days and the lack of professionalism they show. Two weeks ago we had after work drinks to celebrate a recent highly publicised court win and Ms.DWP feeling particularly jovial and generous invited us to her house for more drinks. Now normally invitations like these I would respectfully decline but as I am currently angling for a promotion getting into Ms.DWP's good books was important. So I attended, besides I have a little crush on Ms.DWP's younger brother who lives with her....make the most of every opportunity I say! Now Ms.DWP got quite hammered on Grand Mimosa's and I became her new best friend. She told me more than I needed to know like the places they had made love in all over the office like the photocopier room, the kitchen (eeeeew), the conference room...etc etc (I am so taking anti-bacterial spray and wipes to work tomorrow). She also told me the people she intended to fire this year (thankfully I was not on the list). Now the day after she took a week off work and returned this week to fire Secretary 2 and some other employees based in Sydney. I approached her today to discuss my promotion which had been hanging in the balance for the last 3 months, it had been dangled over my head to make sure I continued working the sweat shop hours I currently work. Today was my appointment to discuss my promotion and do you know what this woman said to me? After working for 3 years for this firm, Monday sometimes through to Saturday, covering for people who were late, absent, quit, got fired without complaining once, never been sick or late either. She HAS THE AUDACITY to advise me that "You are still a bit young to handle the very difficult position of head researcher as it requires a certain level of experience and professionalism which I think you need to work on for a few more months." Now bloggers I was speechless, I tried to point out that I had effectively held that position unofficially for the last six months as the head researcher had suddenly quit and they had not replaced him in all that time. Who did she think had been running things? Now I feel knowledge is power bloggsville, should I use my knowledge? Fraternising with fellow employees is not looked favourably upon at our office and in fact I can say that unofficially it is not allowed. So what should I do? I deserve this promotion and I can see that this woman does not listen to reason.....

As per City Girl, I hope Akin has decided to see the light now and maybe her and I can now focus on this problem at hand. I am not a Naija babe but I can invoke some of that Naija strength she has in her. Till next time bloggers.....

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11 comments: to “ The afternoon delight and Devil Wears Prada

  • Afrobabe
    3 September 2008 at 06:25  

    Wow, absolutely loved the entry… When my boss left I was so scared of hearing those same words from my ceo but for some reason he decided to give me a chance…if I blog about my ex boss who is a gay drama king I will never finish posting….He is such a bitch…but met one in me…it was a constant stream of nails on skin…

  • mona
    4 September 2008 at 02:03  

    I am loving this blog every second. Your work place is something out of a movie or something. That Ms. Dwp is a major birch. I don’t know how to advice you. That’s tough. Maybe continue to get in her good books and talk to her in a few weeks. If she is the only one with power to give you the promotion then you may need to get her to like you. That’s all I can think of. Poor secretary 2

  • Toluwa Lase
    4 September 2008 at 03:33  

    i feel sorry for secetary 2. Regrding wat u shld do? i wld say relax for THE few more months she wants you to, and then re-approach her. If she says the same thing...let her know that you KNOW!

    Most female bosses are a pain!

  • wordsmith
    4 September 2008 at 03:56  

    wow... i don't know what to seems you certainly don't want her against you... but if she is already...think. maybe a way forward will present itself. I love the female bosses I've had tho...but its just been internships thus far...

  • Hunter girl
    4 September 2008 at 06:25  

    Hey, first time here...i like...
    I'm suprised that you say you aren't a niga babe...cus u sure write like one!!! (LOL...i meant that as a complement)!!

    As for your promotion well you have 2 options
    1. Continue to kiss ass and see where that gets you
    2. Make a written step by step account of the roles/tasks you have been doing and why you deserve the job. Explain the relevant new skills you have aquired since you took up the role and how you intend to restructure (if necessary the dept). Meet with her in a months time and discuss again.

    Would also advice searching for similar roles outside you company. If you dont feel appreciated chances are you should move somewhere else!!!

  • ShonaVixen
    4 September 2008 at 07:32  

    girl first time on this blog and I loved your entry..forgot i was supposed to do some work whilst reading as much as knowledge is power, we also know how nasty Ms DWP is, so just stay calm for the next few months that she has suggested, and get back to her,u already have been running the show, and as huntergirl said, write it all down, step by step..or rather down ur own perfomance evaluation and present it to her after the few months..hope all goes well and once more lurved the post!!xoxo

  • Bondgirl
    4 September 2008 at 09:14  

    First of all thanks to everyone for their comments...I am loving blogville and attempting to read all of your posts!
    @ afrobabe, I am hoping I don't have to go bitch to bitch with her...keep watching though!
    @ mona you have no idea how this woman operates when the movie came out I was like surely they must have interviewed her for ideas?
    @ toluwa lase you are so right why can they be such a pain???
    @ wordsmith i wish I had your luck with good bosses..
    @ hunter girl I really like your advice and actually sat down to do that today
    @ always glad to sidetrack someone with my crazy life at least it is being useful by entertaining you

  • Buttercup
    4 September 2008 at 12:30  

    wow...thats just crazy...i hate Ms DWP already!

    poor sec no 2..

    ok, i feel u shud just keep doin what u do, only with more passion n what not, she'll see how determined u r eventually...n yea, PRAY!

    i also thot u were keep being there for city girl, she'll be aii! u will too!

  • Chari
    5 September 2008 at 03:19

    still tryna find the right words...

    First I am officially a big fan o ur blog...BIG TIME....

    theeeenn...ur boss I wont lie to u mehn I dunno what u should do at all...I'ma jus keep ma trap shut...

  • Chari
    5 September 2008 at 03:22  

    I can't help asking though...what is the labour force like in australia? I was thinking maybe you should shop for other job offers...then lay them out for her and tell her you turned down these offers and ask her for a counter offer...twas sth ma father did 20 years ago I dunno if it will work now...

  • theicequeen
    16 September 2008 at 17:39  

    hahahahahah!! buahhahah!..i'm laughing every kind of laugh that has ever been invented! it's like a soap opera! she fires the fiance of the bloke she's shagging..don't people ever get ashamed when they realize they are such cliches?!

    loving this blog more and more every second!


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