A night out: Bond Girl Vs Teni......Round 1
Saturday, 29 November 2008
Alcohol truly is the truth serum that loosens tongues and the Margaritas at Teni's birthday gave her some false Dutch courage. I was rather taken aback at the blunt question she threw at me so much so I had to lean forward and ask her to repeat it lest I had heard wrong. So steadying herself against the bar she shouted in my ear asking, " So how good do you fcuk then? Do you put your legs behind your ears? Dutty wine on his D*ck? Because I am trying to find out how he stays loyal to you. You are not in his league". I raised my eyebrows at her boldness. I almost walked off because I was so insulted and could feel my hand itching to let the glass of Margarita in her face...but its the credit crunch no need to waste good alcohol on ignorant family members. I am not ugly nor am I fat but its just that Black's quite good looking people expect him to date someone flawless with an eating disorder....like Teni's skinny ass. Instead I replied "I don't know Teni I guess its the moves been fcuking for awhile now...I'm so good at perfecting my craft the karma sutra guidelines reference my shit". Her mouth dropped open, I am generally not crass nor am I outwardly rude unless you cross me then you see that the flames were in my belly the whole time all I needed was some dry wood to be thrown at me to start a fire.
I left her standing at the bar to go join Black at one of the little bar tables the club had. When I got there he saw that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I really wanted to tell him that the way Teni had dismissed the reality of our relationship by stating it was about sex was really bugging me. I wanted to tell him that even though I looked damn good in my dark green chiffon grecian style dress, with bare back and gold accessories and high heels her constant touchy feely nature towards Black and her attempts at shutting me out were grating on my nerves. However I just shook my head, told him I was fine and looked for the waiter to order another margarita. If you have too many things to think about stop thinking start drinking! An hour later I went to the bathroom and when I was coming out there I see Black and Teni arguing. Well she was crying, looking like a drunk mess and he looked majorly unimpressed. When he saw me, he left her and walked over to me and asked "Can we go now?". I nodded and looked over his shoulder at Teni who was looking at us intently like she was waiting for something. I looked at Black and asked him "First, whats going on with you and Teni?". He shook his head and said, "Babe lets not get into this now, just lets go. She's had a lot to drink so let her sober up, you sober up and we can hash it out tomorrow". Then he tried to usher me towards the door. I firmly refused to budge and raised an eyebrow quizzically "I am not going anywhere and there is no need to usher me towards the door. Whats going on?". Black sighed, you know one of those "I might as well tell her but ish is about to hit the roof and I aint finna deal with people's ish tonight" sigh.
"I asked her what she said to you. She told me. I asked why she would say some dumb ish like that and then she told me because you are not right for me. Then she said she was right for me and was available any time I decided I got tired of being the good stand by BG through everything kind of guy".Now bloggers like I said I am not a dramatic child,other people are dramatic and then they bring their drama to my circle but I am not mad at them because its people like Teni that encouraged me to start blogging. So that I could share the WTF moments I have nearly every week of my life with people who are unbiased. When I looked over Black's shoulder Teni was no longer to be seen and Black was blocking me, I msssscheeeeewed him and nearly lapsed into my mother tongue, instead I settled for a healthy tirade, " Iwe, lets just get out of here. I don't want to speak to her, I don't want to see her. she has her own damn man, who happens to be roaming around here so what she wants mine? Why? I know there is a man shortage around but there is no need to start poaching. Thats the ish that gets you shot! As for you Black you are too damn nice to the bitch. No wonder she thinks she's in with a chance".
The minute I said it I regretted it but you know when things are said in the heat of the moment you can't take them back because they run away so fast from you. All you are left holding is hindsight and an a possible apology. "Sorry" I whispered and started walking out of the club. The alcohol started to hit me the minute I went outside. The warm summer breeze cooled my skin but did not do the same for my temper. It was a very quiet ride home in the early hours of Saturday morning and for the first time Black and I slept in the same bed without having sex. The next night I thought it would be the same until about 2am he reached for me and we had a good make up session.
Now my dilemma lies in telling my man that I am not comfortable with him talking or even seeing Teni who I know has put herself out there on the platter to be sampled. I have never been a jealous girl but all of a sudden the arrival of Teni has me seeing flames. I have never been one of those girls that would ban her man from hanging or talking to certain girls but its like now I get it. If you knew a girl was actively chasing your man or had offered herself to your man do you trust your man not to stray or do you submit to your fears and insecurities and try to put barriers to stop any form of contact between the two? So I sit here thinking that City Girl had been right to tell me to confront Teni and see where her head was at. I believe her exact words were "Sometimes when someone shows you what sort of person they are....you should take their word for it and believe them".
Tell me your suggestions people! till next time.....
30 November 2008 at 01:24
Oh My gosh. I just have my mouth open like this. Chei, My people. See me see trouble o. Ha ha! Ehn. That girl Teni needs to be flogged. I woulda thrown that drink in her face, smash the bottle on her head and throw her skinny ass into the pool; (Well if there had been a pool). And not because of a Man but because she was disrespectful and stupid. I cannot abide such idiocy. Now that I am done ranting. Ask Black what he thinks should be done about Teni. If you act too jealous, that may just chase him into Teni's emanciated arms. So Bondy dearest, choose your steps clearly and make sure that Black gets a say in whatever you do. It should be a strategy both of yall come up with ok. Err what do I know, I just made a mess of my relationship, so I definetely do not need to be giving advices. Well Goodluck Lovey. GOSH I hate bitchass bitches like that. It gets me all worked up.
30 November 2008 at 01:36
@ I know its going to be a problem though to approach Black about this but I have to gather the courage. what if he says he still wants to be friends with her and I am over reacting? But I know I need to speak to him before I do anything drastic. Thanks Temite
30 November 2008 at 04:11
Hey... accept my sympathies per your litle spat with Teni.. maybe some alcohol is good afterall.. its exposed her for what she really is... I would think that you and Black need to be on the same page...You both need to decide where your relationship is going (methinks you've done that already) and actively work towards taking it there... The past couple of years have made me start distancing myself from relationships that are going nowhere.... I agree with Temite that whatever you do has to be in conjunction with him.. cos if there's even a smal chance that he's interested in the chick being overly aggressive in your response can give her the chance to feign victim here....
The key as I see it is not to react over the top -yet send a clear statement that you (both) are in this for the long haul and will not accept any interference from any 3rd party...
That he took the time out to go find out what she said and reayed the detailed of their conversation to you seems to suggest that you're on a firm footing.. Just need to ensure that you don't slip up going forward....
Good luck...
30 November 2008 at 06:43
OMG!!!!!!!
WTH!!!! Imagine the Nan-Sense!!!
She deserves to be bitch slapped, It's sad that we just don't do physicals.....Tsk!
Moving on........The thing is, You and Black have to have a very serious discussion about this issue, explain how you feel and then both of you come to an agreement.
The line has to be drawn, you might not want it to seem like you're giving him orders and stuff like that, so you must speak to him in a manner that he'll see things from your perspective.
But make sure you two talk about it,don't bottle it up.
PS: It might take him a while to adjust too, so you have to be patient with that and try not to make it too much of an issue.
30 November 2008 at 10:32
Wow! That is one rude woman! IMO, hotness or not, she doesn't sound like Black's kind of girl. I think you should have a talk with him, and instead of voicing your insecurity, approach it from the angle of the fact that she is disrespectful towards you, and that is not acceptable. Does Black want to be friends with girls who will go around calling his girl all sort of names? I don't think so.
30 November 2008 at 10:58
WTF!!!!!!!!!!
that was bang out of order
drunk or sober she oversteped the 'family' line
friends can get away with ish like that
but when you are family????????
Dont forbid Black to do anything though, coz men hate that
its Teni who has the problem and not your man so trust shouldnt even be an issue
If he loves you enough he will avoid her like a contagious plague without u having to put some do's and donts into the equation
30 November 2008 at 11:18
My alter ego (Sikira)wishes you had dumped the magarita in twiggy's face, and bitch slapped her across the bar, but here's what the sane part of me thinks...
I agree with Temite. You both need to address this issue. But you might not want to add 'rules' to the equation, as that might offend him and he seems like such a great guy. Just let him know that Ms. Twiggy is being disrespectful to you and ask for his 'advice' on how to go about it. He seems like the kind of guy that's going to say 'ignore it, babe'. I hope he doesn't.
30 November 2008 at 11:49
china, you truly did hold your own by not going all mbamas out on her for real!!Just talk to Bond, communicate with him, dont loose your cool(not that you will),let him hear and understand where u are coming from it will be fine and as for anorexic Teni - i could say a few words in the mother tongue too..lol
30 November 2008 at 16:58
@ Danny I agree with you that at least I know what she has on her mind now right?
@ sirius I think patience will be the key...lol @ its a pity we dont allow physicals
@ Pink M I think he is not impressed with her at being so rude but I am not sure what he thinks of discontinuing their relationship
@ MDM ...OOOH babe I wish he would just take the initiative to avoid her himself but he's the type of guy that just wont do that. He will try and resolve the issue
@ Nefertiti....bring your alter ego over here and sort Teni out for me please!!
@ Shona....eish China you know this...ah he was bo lucky not to hear some things from my mouth I tell you!
30 November 2008 at 17:51
ooohhh...i knew this Teni girl will bring gist for us. lol!!
meanwhile, please tell me where u are that it's summer in November. I NEED to move there. Cos its cold as.......hell here?
Back to Teni. It's good u didnt go ghetto on her ass but meeehhn u sure need to set her straight and tell her to back the eff OFF!!!! And tell ur dude u don't like him talking to her. MARK ur territory!
30 November 2008 at 18:23
i totaly agree with Temite...
ooohhhh...ppl like this make my blood boil!
1 December 2008 at 19:29
Well, Now you can believe what kind of person Teni is. She believes her own press and her own press about you too. But what do you believe? What kinda press are you saying about you? Do you think that you are not right for Black? Undeserving? Out of your league? What kinda of men have you dated that gives Teni or anyone else the impression that you are clearly out of your league?
Now..Be honest with Black! I hate what Teni said and I would appreciate it if you didn't hang with her. It's not that I'm worried or don't trust you, it's that I trust Teni to be Teni and try to put you in a situation and then throw it in my face. She will become a constant threat! Our lives will be miserable if we let it.
Ps. What does IWE mean? I have a song with that title from the Noisettes. Is it a Shona word?
Be Good and stop by
Mista Jaycee
2 December 2008 at 10:57
Well, I don't think flogging is enough for Teni. I'm thinking of something more than flogging...
Crap!
9 December 2008 at 07:30
Lord God...you are a better person than me babes...I would have given her a black eye and claimed it was the drink...bitch needs beating..
and yeah i wouldn't be comfortable with her being in my guys life either...so I guess its time to give him an ultimatum...Being nice and well behaved doesn't always pay...
11 December 2008 at 06:58
WOW..im just really stunned..and to think that shes family!